A Blast From The Past!!

During the end of World War II  Mom had served 2 years in the WAAC (Women’s Army Air Corps) as an airplane dispatcher. During that time she had met a tall, dark, and handsome Italian and had an affair. When they were discharged, each went their separate ways--he back to California, she back to Small Town Indiana.

Soon after arriving home, she discovered she was pregnant. Oh my! This was unacceptable back in those days--unmarried and pregnant! Oh no! She lived quietly and kept to herself until she gave birth to a beautiful little girl. Within the first few months of the baby’s life, Mom adopted her out to a preacher and his wife. She went on with her life comforted with the knowledge that her baby would be well taken care of.

Jump to 1964---I am 14 years old and was in our basement searching for whatever a nosy teenager might search for. Underneath a hanging clothing bag I discovered a small black trunk--what’s this? I opened the trunk. There, inside a shirt box, was a baby’s white christening dress and a pair of white satin baby slippers. I thought to myself “I wonder if these were mine?” Beneath the shirt box was a shoe box tied with a string. I slipped off the string, took off the lid and found old letters from a man named G. The letters were to my mother.

I poured over those letters and discovered my mother’s ‘checkered’ past. She and G had exchanged letters for a few months after their discharge from the service. Mom had written to him about a baby named TJ and he didn’t seem interested in being a father or a husband and told her to do whatever she thought best. So, I gathered, from all of this information, that the gown and slippers were TJ’s. Further down in the trunk were a few pictures of a beautiful baby girl with dark hair and dark eyes. On the back of one photo was her birth name, birth date, and the name of the couple who adopted her. I was ecstatic with this discovery! I’ve got an older sister somewhere! Lots of questions came to mind and I felt so frustrated because I knew I couldn’t confront my mother with it. During my teen years, she was a very strict, cold woman and these things simply weren’t talked about.

I put everything back exactly as I found it. I was tormented by this knowledge for many years. I was only able to talk about it with my younger sister who was as enthralled with this mystery as I was. Where was TJ? What was she like now? Was she ever told about her birth mother? My mission was to find the answers to these questions. I vowed that one day I would.

Jump to 1969---I’m 19 years old and pregnant, unmarried with my first daughter. Her father was younger than I and his parents wouldn’t give permission for him to marry. My mother was appalled! This was not acceptable! I would have to give up the baby for adoption! She was angry, irate and not understanding whatsoever! She blurted out what had happened to her when she was pregnant with TJ. I told her I had found the trunk years ago and had always wondered about the baby and how to find her. She was stunned! She calmed down and we talked about her past. I told her I wasn’t going to follow in her footsteps. I was going to keep this baby. She became very quiet as she digested this statement and finally gave up and accepted the fact that I was going to do this--with or without her.

I was never really able to do anything with the facts I’d learned about TJ. Over the years, I’d tried to look up information at the library and through old phone books. I was trying to find her adopted parents but, over time, my memory of the facts became skewed and I didn’t have the right name anymore. I was very frustrated because of this and Mom wasn’t any help. She wouldn’t talk about it anymore. The trunk had been lost, somehow, over the years so I couldn’t look up the info in there either!

The years went by and, in 2001, I was introduced to the world of computers. there was a wealth of information out there in cyberspace. Once I had mastered the workings of the internet, I resumed my search for TJ. I tried, on and off, for the next several years. Four years ago, I posted on Ancestry.com. I typed in all of the pertinent information but all I could find was her birth date and it was under a different name. I wasn’t sure if the info was correct or not. A few phone calls and emails led to a dead end. I gave up and forgot about it for a long time.

3 weeks ago, just before going to bed, I received a message from Ancestry.com that I had a new reply to my post. At first, I had no idea what that post would be about--I’d forgotten. I got on the site and pulled up the message.

“I'm pretty sure I have the right person.  My daughter found your post on ancestry.com last night looking for TJ and has spent the whole day searching for you.  She found your web sites and various other info--Google is her new best friend!  Now all that is left to do is to actually contact each other.  I'm scared and excited all at the same time.  My name is ---------.   Looking forward to receiving a reply.  If you are not Barbara ------- from -----------, I will be sorely disappointed, but please reply anyway to let me know either way.
 Hopefully your sister,
TJ”

I was stunned. I started shaking. I kept repeating ‘oh my god’ over and over again. I simply could not believe it! Yet I knew, at the same time, that this was true--this was real!! I fired off a reply and went to bed knowing it could take a while before she read and replied to the message. When I got up the next morning, the reply was there. I answered and gave her my email address and she emailed me soon after.

How do I tell Mom about this wonderful discovery? I was very nervous to bring it up to her. How would she feel? How would she react? Would this upset her or make her happy. I talked to sis about it first and we agreed this wasn’t something we could keep from her--the truth had to be told.

Surprisingly, she was very calm about it! She said she knew her past would catch up with her one day and TJ would try to find her. I told her about my search for TJ over the years and she was surprised at that revelation, also, but was accepting of it. Over the past 3 weeks, TJ and I have exchanged many, many emails and, each time, I printed them out for Mom to read and she was so happy! We found out TJ had 2 children--a girl and a boy--and Mom would say “I have 2 more grandchildren!”

The BIG surprise was that they all lived right here, for many years! Right here in our West Texas town!! That close and none of us ever knew! Amazing, simply amazing!!

This past Sunday, TJ and her daughter came to visit for the afternoon (her son was out of town at the time). It was a wonderful, happy reunion and one of many, hopefully, to come! The funniest remark was made by Mom after they’d left. “Well, she didn’t look like the TJ that I remember!”  Ummm Mom...it’s been 63 years, she was a baby -- she’s not going to look the same!! Hahaha!!

I will keep you all apprised of future happenings with our newfound family members! We are all so happy and, sometimes, it still doesn’t seem real!! Yeh, what a ‘blast from the past’ it’s been!